Friday, February 29, 2008

Do you have horrible dandruff?

Hospital beds surprisingly are available in the free section often, as are bedpans, adult diapers, diaper pails, scrubs, free samples of diet pills, and exercise equipment. But even among the medical and hygiene products listed, there's still a few that makes me shake my head...

This guy found some toothpaste:

A tube of natural toothpaste
Reply to: XXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-26, 9:56PM PST

It's a tube of Tom's of Maine toothpaste, natural antiplaque tartar control plus whitening toothpaste.

The toothpaste itself is white. So is the tube, mostly, but there's a bit of purple on there too. The toothpaste is fennel flavored. Fennel is that almost crazy flower lookin, sort of licorice-y tasting plant you might have in your garden. The toothpaste tastes OK, but it dries my mouth out too much for me.

I used a little bit of the toothpaste.

So, yeah.

You can keep your teeth clean and save yourself a few bucks. (Seriously, I think it sells for around five bucks at New Seasons.)

No, sorry, I don't have a pic.

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Only respond if your nickname is The Blizzard...

Dandruff Cream
Reply to: XXXXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-01-15, 3:18AM PST

Does anyone have horrible dandruff? I have some expensive cream that works well on this. Only four bottles so I would prefer to save it for four different people with BAD dandruff. Thank you

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Um. Why. Do. You. Have. This...Oh nevermind, I don't really want to know.

Bag of 5 disposable mesh underwear XLG - 40"-50" - Hospital
Reply to: XXXXXXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-28, 6:39AM EST

Unopenned; Medline brand; latex-free; 12% spandex

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This person should get with Toothpaste Guy and offer a special deal...

FREE USED TOOTH BRUSH*******************
Reply to: XXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-27, 10:57AM EST

4 year older and a little brown but its FREE so hurray to murray

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Advice Guy strikes again! And he can't spell this time...

Free!! High Blood Pressure Advise (Midtown East)
Reply to: XXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-28, 11:37AM EST

sorry, I can't keep this to myself --I just discovered a miracle from blending 1 banana, 1 cup pineaple, half cup orange juice and two garlic cloves -- when my BP is real high, after drinking this stuff it goes back to normal in the shortest time --another miracle, you don't taste the garlic and it also does not smell from your mouth.

I am not telling you to stop taking your BP medication -- this is for people like me who either don't afford medication or still want to do the right thing to help the medication. !!

Best wishes!

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Best wishes indeed. There will be more medical and hygiene related posts in the future. For now, I leave you with the Awesome Find of the Day:

Start your own Chinese New Year Parade!

papier mache chinese dragon
Reply to: see below
Date: 2008-02-26, 4:22PM PST

FREE! Chinese Dragon!
Large, colorful, papier mache dragon with painted cloth body long enough to accommodate 8-10 kids. Ideal for parades, school assemblies, festivals, cultural events. Pick up in Long Beach. Contact – XXXXX



If I lived in Long Beach, this would be in my house right now and I would be in it.

Ciao!

Thursday, February 28, 2008

This is the first entry...

...and none of the following Craigslist posts involve couches. These are all real, taken from mid January to yesterday. This will be a longer post than normal to give you a taste of what I have. From here on out, there will only be a few posts a day tops. Enjoy!

First up, my favorite type of free listing, the ol' I-Have-No-Idea-What-This-Is-Take-It-Please...

Free bag of ...something
Reply to: XXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-25, 1:28PM MST


Hi I have a free bag with some stuff in it. I found i behind the couch lol, so I think there are like some gadget cords and a jacket, I can probably find some more stuff if you're willing to take it. Thanks!!!

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Expired food anyone?

Milk * Beans
Reply to: XXXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-26, 4:55PM HST

12 gallons of milk available (10 2%, 3 Whole). They are expired, but have been kept in freezer since purchase. Although some suggest thawed milk is best for cooking/baking (vs drinking), it is really a matter of preference as the only difference is in consistency...Would VERY much appreciate a donation, but don't let that discourage you - I would rather it go to someone who can USE it =0)

Also have 5 bags of beans, all unopened. 3 are expired (2 Pinto, 1 Red), 2 do not have expiration dates (both Kidney)...No donation necessary.

Pick-up only.

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This one personally amuses me. There are perks to working on a film set...

Potatoes & Pears
Reply to: XXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-26, 10:28AM PST

My husband brought home a big sack each of small white potatoes and pears from a film shoot. He gets off work too late to swing by a food bank. Too much for us to eat before it all goes bad. I'll hang the bags in front of XXX Santa Clara AVe.

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Continuing the food theme...

Free Pancakes
Reply to: XXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-22, 10:36AM EST

We made too many pancakes today so we've got some left over. These were delicious, made from a mix, but also with eggs and milk/cream, and nothing would make us happier than to share a homemade breakfast with you.

So come on and get some while the getten's good

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Oof... some details need to be left unsaid...

My Dog Died
Reply to: XXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-24, 1:34AM PST

I have 2 leashes,canned food,dry food,and a sleeping pad (needs a cleaning)

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And some things need to be thrown out...

free flowers
Reply to: XXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-24, 2:53PM PST

i have some flowers that were bought a few days ago from trader joes. they are beautiful and nearly dead but i'm sure someone can get a couple hours use out of them. they're in the trash can on the side of my house. email me for the address and you can come get them any time.

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There are many perils to the free listings. It is quite often that people accidentally take more than what is offered for free. This honestly sounds like a real theft, but the lesson here is never leave your shit unattended...

COME ON PEOPLE! BRING BACK MY.....
Reply to: XXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-26, 6:37PM EST

I SAID "ANYTHING UNDER THE TARP AND THE DOUBLE SINK! NOT MY GARBAGE CAN AND MY FLOWER POT! AND MY PATIO TABLE THAT I JUST BOUGHT. I WAS TRYING NICE! PLEASE BRING IT BACK. THANK YOU.
YOU GOT A LOT OF FREE STUFF. I WANT MY FLOWER POT AND KITCHEN GARBAGE CAN BACK. AND MY TABLE. I HAVE THE CHAIRS THAT GO WITH IT. THANK GOD I WAS USING THEM IN THE BACK. NO MORE PEOPLE PLEASE. THAT IS JUST DISGUSTING!

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Anyone want an Ostrich? Yes, I said that right...

ostrich male
Reply to: XXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-02, 3:55PM PST

We will give a beautiful ostrich male to a worthy home. The lucky recipient must be knowledgeable and must have appropriate fencing to house an ostrich.
You will be required to catch, load and haul this bird WITHOUT our assistance. These birds are known to be dangerous so only qualified handlers need reply

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There's always a few folks trying to hand out "free advice", but this guy has built a whole identity around it. But don't ask anything about health, business, or taxes...

Free Advice on Anything (no health, business, or tax advice)
Reply to: see below
Date: 2008-02-25, 10:56PM EST

You have problems?
Need a second opinion?
Fashion emergency?
Just need to get something off your chest?

Send me your dilemma and I'll see if I can help. You may not like what I have to say, but hey - it's a second opinion... and it's FREE! It's there's no strings, no obligations.

Why do I do this? Because I'm concerned that I haven't done my part in this crazy world to pull my own weight. I'm trying to boost my karma. Call me selfish.

UPDATE: I've had a wonderful response and have been able to talk to many, many people. I hope you are all doing well. Thanks for your emails!

-Mr. Cheap Advice

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Well that's it for today. I will now leave you with a song...for comfy chairs. Until next time...

There's a chair in my car port
Reply to: XXXXXXX@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-02-25, 7:04PM PST


To the tune of "There's a Hole in my Bucket."

There's a chair in my carport, Dear Reader, Dear Reader,
There's a chair in my carport, Dear Reader, A chair.

What sort of chair is it, Dear Writer, Dear Writer,
What sort of chair is it, Dear Writer, what sort?

It's a comfy blue armchair, Dear Reader, Dear Reader,
It's a comfy blue armchair, Dear Reader, comfy.

What's the matter with the chair, Dear Writer, Dear Writer,
What's the matter with the chair, Dear Writer, What's wrong?

My Sister's cat got to it, and scratched it, Dear Reader,
And it doesn't recline very easily now.

Why would I want to take it, Dear Writer, Dear Writer,
Why would I want to take it, Dear Writer, tell why?

Because it's comfy and soft, Dear Reader, Dear Reader,
It's comfy and soft, Dear Reader, so soft.

It would be good in my game room, when I'm watching the TV,
Or out in my garage, Dear Writer, in my garage.

But there's still a chair in my carport, Dear Reader, Dear Reader,
There's still a chair in my carport, Dear Reader, still there.

So reply to my posting, Dear Reader, Dear Reader,
And you can have it, Dear Reader, have it.


Ciao!